On embracing beginner-hood

Don’t let a decade of exploration slip by you

If you could explore a new creative pursuit, what would it be? What, if anything, holds you back from beginning to explore?

Last week I released a beautiful conversation with

Dan Blank

about finding connection and community through creativity. I love Dan’s perspective on why it is wonderful to be a beginner—that the beauty of being a beginner is that you’re forgiven for messing up; that giving yourself the permission to explore is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself.

His comments made me think about my own arc—exploration and mistakes were not encouraged when I was a kid. In some cases, mistakes led to punishment (drop and do 10 pushups for every incorrect vocabulary flashcard response); other times, my embarrassment over more minor mistakes led me to give up. 

I remember the first cake I tried to make from scratch. We always made Duncan Hines box mix cakes for birthdays and I wanted to try something new, something special. We had a paperback copy of the Fannie Farmer cookbook and I loved browsing through the wholesome American recipe titles—it was like an aspirational assimilation catalog.

I selected a Feathery Fudge Chocolate Cake recipe from the cookbook. I knew nothing about baking technique and I imagine I didn’t follow the instructions that well. The resulting baking fail—a dense, unappealing chocolate brick—became a longstanding family joke.

It took a decade for me to try cake baking again.

As a graduate student, Martha Stewart Living and Bon Appetit were the 2.0 version of my culinary assimilation catalog. The pretty photographs and encouraging editorial descriptions gave me a shot of inspiration and courage. On my own, I decided to try cake baking again, in addition to other sweet and savory recipes. I kept experimenting and learning the basics. When I became a mom I began experimenting with decoration, delighting in the magic that could result from sprinkles, food coloring, and piping tips. I taught my kids to cook and bake as our way to play (I never had patience for playing on the floor with toys). Cake making is now one of my great creative joys; a way to show my love and a tactile counterpart to all of my time tapping away at a keyboard.

My most recent cake—a gift for my niece Madeleine’s 10th birthday

I also have watched my husband’s creative exploration with awe. He is a recreational, self-taught woodworker and the other day I asked if he could remember the first thing he ever made. It was a ski rack—so, that was 7 or 8 years ago, when we learned to ski as a family—and over the years it has been amazing to see him engage in trial and error to create coasters, cutting boards, side tables, headboards, desks, picture frames, and even tiny custom stands for my crystal orbs. His latest project was driven by the need for a laundry hamper, our sticker shock over what a wooden or woven hamper costs, and the opportunity to try something new.

It looks incredible right? And knowing how much I like when things get used up, he challenged himself to make the slats out of scraps from his wood pile. Extra incredible.

These are a couple of examples of creative pursuits that have led to beautiful finished products, but I have tried plenty of things that didn’t stick. It takes those meanderings to figure out what will light you up in a particular phase of life. As Dan said, just start. Embrace being a beginner and don’t let a proverbial Feathery Fudge fail keep you from trying again for a freaking decade.

If you are looking for ideas for creative pursuits, listen to this episode on cultivating hobbies and interests, which includes a slew of crowdsourced ideas.

And here are a few creative newbie things I am thinking about.

1. I have a lot of experience decorating cakes using piping tips, but one style that I would like to try is palette knife decorating. I love Lizzie Lin Johnson’s work and bought a set of palette knives a year or two ago on her recommendation and they are still in the wrapper! Violet’s birthday is coming up next month and I asked if she would be OK with me experimenting with the palette knives for her cake—noting it might end up not working—and she said, “Yes, Mom, try it! You have been wanting to do that forever!”

2. One thing that has been on my mind for some time is gardening and medicinal herbs. I would like to sink into learning about native perennials. What feels creative and magical is thinking about the changing landscape across seasons and how to do gardening that is more chaos than meticulous in approach, while allowing for bursts of color across seasons.

3. And then a more recent idea—as in, as of a week ago—is that I have been thinking about trying to write a novel, with the full understanding that it is about the process not the product. I have a fledgling idea for a storyline and Googled “how to outline a novel” the other week. LOL. This is a fun, longer-term creative project.

I hope this post gives you a shot of creative inspiration and courage. I am rooting for your exploration!

P.S. In this lessons from one year on Substack post I wrote, “If you seek deeper human connection and are exhausted by the numbers game, you need

Dan Blank

in your brain.” I later joked with him that I was envisioning merch with his head popping out of the cortical folds. This one’s for you, Dan!